A Royal Yacht

It has been proposed that as part of the Queen’s Jubilee celebrations, she should receive a gift of a new royal yacht.

Despite the recent claims that the yacht would be purchased by as yet undisclosed (and I suggest currently non-existent) private capital, it is thought that government had intended to spend public money on the project.  We are assured that investors would jump at the chance to put their capital into such a project.  I’m sure many hedge fund managers would think it prudent to invest their money in buying somebody else a yacht.  Let us also remember that one of the main reasons for getting rid of the previous yacht was the extortionate running costs, which I would certainly presume that the Nation would foot the bill for.

It is more likely that this private capital was dreamed up as a way of placating a soon-to-be outraged public if they didn’t think of a way of pretending that they hadn’t been intending to use public money.  A leaked letter by Michael Gove to the Prime Minister betrays Mr Gove & David Willetts’s opinions on the matter.  Mr Gove writes, “In spite, and perhaps because of, the austere times, the celebration should go beyond those of previous jubilees, and mark the greater achievement that the diamond anniversary represents…a gift from the nation to her majesty…as David Willetts’s excellent suggestion of a royal yacht”.  He continues, “If there is not sufficient public money, then we should look for generous private donations to give every school a lasting memento”.  Not content with buying a yacht, he wants somebody to buy perhaps a model yacht for schools to put next to the personally signed & foreworded copy of the King James Bible that Mr Gove has spent £200,000 on sending to schools.  This book is available free on the internet via project Gutenberg, although I concede that this edition would not have a riveting foreword by Mr Gove.  For a preview of his exciting and uplifting narrative try this link - http://video.uk.msn.com/watch/video/michael-gove-bores-students/2gyre20h .

It is a little perplexing that in the above quote Mr Gove suggests that we should purchase a yacht “because of austere times”.  We see why his party have criticised the Keynsian ideas put forward by the Labour party to spend money to stimulate growth.  Why spend on job creating capital projects when you could buy a yacht – sounds far more fun?

 If we are a little worried that he is not living in the real world, at least we know that somebody in the household (his wife) has a firm grip on the vicissitudes of modern life.  As Mrs Gove wrote in an article in the times last year, “Like all angst ridden working mothers I live in terror of upsetting my cleaner”.  Oh what a curse of modern living!